Community Trust

Posted on April 25, 2014. Filed under: Running | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

ring around the rosie

“Trusting.”

Not a question but an imperative. The girl in the middle closes her eyes and tells her team she is ready.

“You can trust us.”

In unison. They are prepared. To bear her weight, right her when she tips too far out of balance.

It’s a risky game for all involved. A frightening prospect particularly for the one in the middle, who must rely on her peers.

And so begin the Girls on the Run lessons in community. I’ve witnessed this lesson half a dozen times over the past several seasons, showing up by chance to observe a team on the day it’s facilitated.

Only I don’t believe in chance.

This time, something about the game strikes me. Why is it that the very first in a series of games to reinforce the concept of community is about trust? There are so many components of community: What we have in common—values, attitudes, interests, demographics, language, geography—and what we don’t. None of that sort of glue requires trust.

Why do we expect these girls to throw their weight on their team, and why do we expect the team to support it? Is it too much to ask?

I sit on a rock in the shade and watch the girls stand vigil, shoulder to shoulder, over the girl in the center, their eyes somber with responsibility. They giggle and squirm but never remove their gaze from the girl who is trusting, and they never lose their footing.

They seem to know instinctively the importance of their role. If they step aside, a gaping hole remains and the girl in the center falls. There is no one to fill their space. Each of them is necessary.

I watch from the sidelines feeling both hollow and filled. Each time I observe a team I am astonished by the wisdom and strength of these young girls, blown away by their mutual encouragement, moved to tears by their interaction with their coaches.

Yet, each time, I walk away feeling alone. Not lonely, but solitary.

I head back to my car mulling over this day’s lesson and the relationship between trust and community. Most of my own involvement in community has been in the outer circle, standing shoulder to shoulder with others. I have yet to spend much time in the middle, as the girl who is trusting.

I chuckle at the realization and my emptiness dissipates. I have witnessed this lesson half a dozen times over the past several seasons. Today I finally get it.

I don’t believe in chance.

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